


What The Pig's Heart Wants

by helens78



Category: Muppet Show, The Muppets (2011), X-Men: First Class (2011) RPF
Genre: Angst, F/M, Flirting, Humor, Jealousy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-02-13
Updated: 2012-02-13
Packaged: 2017-10-31 03:23:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 465
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/339334
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/helens78/pseuds/helens78
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kermit and Piggy's relationship has survived flirtations with Christopher Reeve, Brad Pitt, John Denver, and others, but can it withstand the interest from one Michael Fassbender?</p>
            </blockquote>





	What The Pig's Heart Wants

**Author's Note:**

> Miss Piggy interviewed Michael Fassbender (see video/transcript [part one](http://helens78.tumblr.com/post/17563482584/michaelfassbenderarchive-michael-fassbender-and), [part two](http://helens78.tumblr.com/post/17563569757/michaelfassbenderarchive-michael-fassbender-and), and [part three](http://helens78.tumblr.com/post/17564758308/michaelfassbenderarchive-michael-fassbender-and), plus a [piece from an article on best-dressed celebs at the BAFTAs](http://helens78.tumblr.com/post/17565050136/miss-piggy-was-one-of-the-better-dressed-stars-on)) at the BAFTAs in February 2012.
> 
> What happened after? Well, even the frog can only speculate.

The frog's nose scrunched up as he watched the interview footage roll in. " _Just going to the BAFTAs_ ," he muttered, " _all I want to do is congratulate the nominees and look at the dresses_ ," he muttered, " _I promise, the teensy-weensy liaison avec Brad is over and done with, nothing to worry about_ ," he muttered.

But there was Piggy, resplendent in her mauve Louis Vuitton gown, trading quips and teases and jokes with Best Actor nominee Michael Fassbender, even going so far as to declare the rising young star "naughty".

"Scooter!" he yelled, ducking his head out of the Other Green Room and looking around for his hapless assistant.

Scooter blinked up at Kermit. "Yeah, boss?"

"I need you to get me the number for that guy, the guy from that movie--"

"Jason Segel?"

"No! No, the _other_ guy." Kermit flailed his arms a bit, fuming. "The one from the new _X-Men_ movie..."

"James McAvoy! Right away, boss!"

"No, no, no! The _bad_ guy from the movie--"

"Kevin Bacon? But I thought Miss Piggy said she'd never work with an actor named Bacon, no matter _how_ much he begged."

" _Not him!_ " Kermit howled, and then, pausing, "Wait. How much _did_ he beg?"

"He only kept calling for a few years," Scooter said. "Not very persistent, considering. Anyway. Who _did_ you want to talk to?"

"Fassbender," Kermit said stormily. "Michael Fassbender."

"You want him on the show?"

"Only if he's willing to sign on as Gonzo's assistant," Kermit muttered.

"What a great idea for a show!" Scooter said, beaming. "He's been in every other movie this year, why not make 2012 the year of Michael and the Muppets? I'll see if I can get a hold of his agent!"

"Wait! No," Kermit said, but Scooter, having grasped the idea in his orange hands, was running with it, down the hall before Kermit could stop him.

Kermit glanced down at his phone, where another video had just made its way to his inbox, by way of An Interested Party Who Thought You Might Want To Know.

" _You've got a love heart in your mouth,_ " Fassbender told Piggy. Kermit glared at the screen... and only glared more when Piggy dazzled the camera with a head-on view of her beautiful heart-shaped tongue. And... Piggy was still _gone_. Still in the UK, still probably hobnobbing with the stars...

_It'll be okay_ , the frog told himself. They'd weathered storms like these before. How could he ever forget Piggy's love affair with Christopher Reeve? The trail of broken hearts Piggy had left in her wake had always been a bit intimidating, making it difficult for Kermit to fully commit to their relationship, but he'd always been _her frog_. They'd really made a fresh start, just last year. It couldn't all be for nothing.

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [[podfic] What The Pig's Heart Wants](https://archiveofourown.org/works/931669) by [helens78](https://archiveofourown.org/users/helens78/pseuds/helens78), [reena_jenkins](https://archiveofourown.org/users/reena_jenkins/pseuds/reena_jenkins)




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